We all want to build strong relationships and connections with people, but sadly, some of us do not get to achieve that. It is so easy to assume that a relationship is an easy two-way street where all that matters are your intentions and the little efforts you are able to squeeze in at your leisure. But this is not so!
The truth is that relationships, both platonic and romantic, takes a lot of work. Sometimes, we mistake our acquaintance with someone for a strong relationship, but an acquaintanceship with someone is just that – a shallow connection and nothing deeper. If you want to become closer to someone, you can’t just flip a switch to automatically strengthen your bond. No, not all! But you must be willing to put in time and efforts to consolidate your relationship.
So, how do you build a strong and healthy relationship with someone? Here are a few tips you should enforce to strengthen your relationship;
#1 – GET TO ACTUALLY KNOW THEM
Sometimes, a lot of us make the mistake of thinking that knowing someone’s name and profession – perhaps by virtue of being introduced by a mutual friend or attending the same Church or class with them – qualifies as knowing all there is to know about them. If you are aiming for a deeper relationship with someone, you need to go beyond the peripheral. Ask them questions about themselves. Seek to know their background, aspirations, passions, drive etcetera. Basically, you should aim to have more conversations with them and get to know things you do not yet know about them.
#2 – SPEND QUALITY TIME TOGETHER
When it comes to building a deeper relationship with someone, nothing beats spending quality time together with that person. Whether seeking to pursue a platonic or romantic relationship, this trip works both ways. Calls, texts, and chats – though great means of communication – can never be equated with a one-on-one physical conversation with an individual. There is a deeper level of connection when it comes to physical interaction because you get to see and hear untold things in their body postures and facial expressions. Invite them to an event, dinner, movies, or a hangout and spend quality time catching up with your partner.
#3 – WORK TOGETHER, IF YOU CAN
This may seem a little hard to even contemplate, but it is a very effective technique if implemented. Working together on a project or anything at all creates a special bond between you two and allows both parties to develop a high level of trust for each other.
This is substantiated by several studies which showed that about 58% of young employees tended to engage in a romantic relationship while the statistics are surprisingly higher (about 72%) for colleagues over 50 years. This attraction, which so frequently happens in the workplace, is largely attributed to repeated exposures (that is, interaction) amongst colleagues and the trust which invariably develops as a result of working together for a common cause.
Moreover, the joy of accomplishment from successfully executing a project is one that you two can share together and hence, strengthen the existing bond between you two. So, whether this means volunteering for the same project you know your human interest is a part of or organizing an event where his/her skillset is needed, try to create an opportunity for you both to work together.
#4 – PLAN AND TAKE A TRIP TOGETHER
Everybody loves a trip, so far as it fits into their schedule. Your interest is not an exception. Planning and taking a trip together is a sure-fire way of strengthening your bond, particularly if you are aiming to pursue a romantic relationship. The excitement of being in a new destination, seeing new sights together, eating new delicacies, or even interacting with new persons creates invaluable memories that you can revel in and cherish forever. Additionally, taking a trip together opens up a whole new world to you too in ways that nothing else can; and it allows you to get to know your partner outside her comfort zone.
#5 – COMMUNICATE FREQUENTLY AND EFFECTIVELY
Effective communication is key to any deep and long-lasting relationship. Be sure you keep all the communication lines open, so your partner can freely and openly communicate with you. Relationships are never perfect. There are times when communicating with your partner may appear difficult, but you should communicate regardless. So if you are bothered, annoyed, or disappointed with your partner, reach out and calmly communicate your irritation. By all means, do not bottle up your emotions because it has a way of backfiring on you. This singular tip assumes more importance than any other and can either make your relationship to thrive or crash it.
#6 – COMPLIMENT IS FREE. PAY IT FREQUENTLY!
Everyone loves to have a good compliment thrown their way now and then. But a lot of people tend to forget how to be gracious with their compliments, especially as the relationship ages. Regardless of the type of relationship you are pursuing, paying compliments to your partner is key to unlocking their full potentials within the relationship.
Even though we don’t necessarily like to admit it, the human mind is naturally designed to seek validation. What positive recognition (compliments, validation etcetera) of others’ efforts does is that it creates emotional safety in the receiver. It also creates a basis for the giver to build a relationship and connect on a deeper level with the receiver. This, in turn, allows your partner to be comfortable enough to allow vulnerability.
#7 – PRACTISE COURTESY
Nothing is more annoying than being in a relationship with someone who has no single stroke of courtesy in him/her; someone who neither values people or time – both his time and that of others. This is the same way it can be frustrating to be in a one-sided relationship with someone who is not willing to reciprocate in any form.
If you wish to strengthen your relationship, you must learn to be courteous in every sense of the word. You must learn to show respect for the other person. Keep to time, when it comes to dates or meetings, and agreements that you both have. If you must cancel a planned meet-up, be sure to do it ahead of time – not at the last minute. And even after you’ve canceled, make a significant effort to make amends. Respect breeds trust. By being respectful to the other person, you ultimately strengthen your relationship with him/her.
#8 – DISAGREE ABD SETTLE AMICABLY
Be it a platonic or a romantic relationship, unpleasant situations must surely raise at one point or another in a relationship. The conflicts you encounter can either strengthen or end your relationship. What makes the difference is the manner with which both parties approach the conflicts. Your ability to resolve and move on from issues amicably is what strengthens a relationship and makes it a near-perfect one. Wondering how to constructively manage your confrontations? Here’s an article with great tips on how to achieve that.
In summary, building a strong and healthy relationship is never easy, but it is very attainable. Though difficult, the benefits from maintaining such a strong relationship makes it worth the efforts. The tips listed in this article can set you on the right track to building a strong relationship with people.